Posted March 23, 2020 by jaynesachs & filed under .
Thanks everyone! And thanks Kay for given the song such great lyrics to begin with!
yes! love it!
Thank you Ms. Lovie!
"you feel my love and I can feel your hurt" ….. great line!
That’s cool Blue
A suggestion for the first line: Maps collapse as borderlines are blurred
Sweet…from that perspective I see where your heading. Also…not saying it outright is one of my favorite ways to write as well. I believe that technique give full credit to the intellect of the listener. I can see that after this round of writing…I'll most likely need to rethink what I had in mind and play a bit of follow the lyric…😊. Ty for taking time to answer the question I had. I look forward to reading what you come up with next. Peace Ron
Thanks Maria.. that’s a nice thing to hear! ❤️❤️
♥ Jayne your words make me cry. This song is going to be so special.
I don’t mind the question Ronnie. To me, it’s not a relationship between two people, it’s a relationship of strangers from around the world. I was basically writing about what is currently happening with the pandemic without mentioning it. I felt the first couplet from Kayla set up the idea that nothing is the same anymore.. so I riffed on that. The title has to do with the world, right? Since I am typing this I can’t click over to another page to confirm but isn’t it something like One World? It could have many interpretations but as a writer I tend to go with how I’m currently feeling.. and right now I’m feeling my own fear and everyone else’s and I’m also feeling love and giving love. So to me it’s not about a romantic relationship going bad.. but Kayly’s lines “could” be interpreted that way. Thanks!
Omg….😱I forgot to wish you good luck…soooo….good luck…Peace RonnieLee 😊
Hi Jayne, This is my favorite so far. It flows well…carries on from the previous lines well also. I do have a question…after the lines " you feel my love and I can feel your hurt"….I'm curious why the next line is "I don't know your name"…I only ask because the lyric you have feels to me more like they know each other pretty well…or did as the first lines have them obviously growing distant. The lines from Kayly I mean. Anyway…pls take this as it's meant…just my curiosity…I never critique anything unless asked and that's usually friends and co-writers. It's a great lyric and I cast a vote for it. Peace RonnieLee
Such beautiful lines!
Love the lines “ I don’t know your name but now we’re just the same”!
Good idea Maria. I like “in this fear”
I really like this Jayne but I'm singing in this fear or in our fear. Goosebumps.
I really like this!